Monday, October 28, 2019

What really rips me to pieces

Some times I think that it will take until judgement day before my children realizes my innocence.  I think my option will have to be for them to be with their relatves in the lake of fire.  They had a lifetime to reconcile, yet they always find fault.  The very thought rips me to pieces....

Sunday, October 27, 2019

My Poor Father

After my father ended up in the hospital, I heard about it and caught a ride to see him.  When I first arrived at the hospital, my mood was nonchalant.  I immediately got to the point and asked him if it was true of what I had recently learned.  He confirmed the question with a "yes she was telling the family."  I asked how severe the damage was and he commenced in painting the same picture I saw with his own words.

My rage flew out of control as I roared the sins of my family so loud, the nurses were checking in to see if everything was ok.  He listened to my story but I couldn't stop yelling at him from the top of my lungs.  He finally had to call the nurse to ask me to leave.  I can understand that I was a bit overwhelming.  Nevertheless, someone spoke to my heart with a sympathy of understanding.  It could have been my father, not sure...

I walked an untold number of miles that night, all the way from the hospital to the exit off of I-5 which leads to Aloa.  A taxy cab driver picked me up and dropped me off 5 blocks where I lived.

I also remember paying Lori Jewett/Vian/Whoever a visit and she also confirmed in me what the family was speaking behind my back.

My Experience

This song explains my emotions on my trip to Seattle and after later encounters with my children.

Fall to pieces

Saturday, October 26, 2019

Update to the family.

I still have my dreams.  God will have mercy on my children.  We will live as royalty in eternity with each other.  My prayer is: I will have the opportunity to behead their relatives with the blessings of God Almighty.  Conceivably, had I have murdered their relatives, they would have a valid reason to hate me like they do.  This does not include my parents, all they are guilty of are being respectable people.  My mother gave me one if the greatest gifts that life has to offer, God's Holy Word.  My father informed me of the evil deeds done behind my back.

Jesus Christ, the Holy Bible, informs us about slander.

"Thou givest thy mouth to evil, and thy tongue frameth deceit.
Thou sittest and speakest against thy brother; thou slanderest thine own mother's son.
These things hast thou done, and I kept silence; thou thoughtest that I was altogether such an one as thyself: but I will reprove thee, and set them in order before thine eyes." - Psalms 50:19-21

"Whoso privily slandereth his neighbour, him will I cut off: him that hath an high look and a proud heart will not I suffer." - Psalms 101:5

"He that hideth hatred with lying lips, and he that uttereth a slander, is a fool." - Proverbs 10:18

"They are all grievous revolters, walking with slanders: they are brass and iron; they are all corrupters." - Jeremiah 6:28

"Take ye heed every one of his neighbour, and trust ye not in any brother: for every brother will utterly supplant, and every neighbour will walk with slanders." - Jeremiah 9:4

"And not rather, (as we be slanderously reported, and as some affirm that we say,) Let us do evil, that good may come? whose damnation is just." - Romans 3:8

"Even so must their wives be grave, not slanderers, sober, faithful in all things." - 1 Timothy 3:11

I think I have ranted enough for now.  My siblings and their children, if they will even read this blog, will know what to expect when they stand before God Almighty on judgement day; oh wait, their bibles are perverted!!!

Saturday, October 12, 2019

Come Home

It was seven years, after my first divorce, I learned why my family were treating me so coldly.   I took my eldest daughter out to Starbucks to enjoy a good visit when she told me about the slander behind my back. I was left speechless before my daughter.  I remember going home and exploding in a fiercely strong rage as all the pieces of the baffling puzzle became resolved.

Some time after that, my father ended up in the hospital.  I paid him a visit and he confirmed to me that they were speaking slanderously about me throughout the whole family.  It's interesting how they murder a character yet never confront that character about the real facts.  I knew it would be just a matter of time, needed a good plan to murder them back.

The anger was not going to stop until every single relative was dead, all but my children.  The plot wouldn't work because nothing would stop me from assassinating their mother.  My children were the only barrier in completing my task.  That dam held me in check until the day when Krystle was suppose to deliver my books and she never showed her face!  No phone call, nothing.  I was patient as Job in waiting as my anger flew off the hook that some how she had turned against me.  My children's lives were not in danger but their relatves were.  I was on my march to murder my sister when it was like the hand of God took me to Seattle.  I was kicked out of the shelter for smoking in my room and the shelter paid for my way away from my family.

I ended up checking in with the VA for counceling over this rage that was ripping me apart.  I vented it very fiercely; yet, Gods hand was in it and I found an excellent counsellor.  I even found a way to forgive my family by allowing them to live.  Ironically, it hasn't worked out between me and my children.  They seem to think I owe the family an apology.  Really?  Since when does an innocent man feel guilty?  It leaves a very bad taste, to the point to where I dedicate the following song to all my relatives, children included...

He Calls Home

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